ESL: chuck Chuck Norris Official FAN CLUB - Team - Italy - Electronic Sports League

Chuck Norris ist schon seit 15 Jahren Tot, Der Tod hat sich nur noch nicht getraut ihm das zu sagen.

Chuck Norris ist nicht ausgestattet wie ein Pferd, Pferde sind ausgestattet wie Chuck Norris.

Jesus ging über das Wasser, Chuck Norris ging über Jesus.

hades.

#-3

11/11/07 02:10

(Archived)

Chuck Norris kann eine ganze M&M Packung nach dem kleinen ABC ordnen :)

T3RROR

#-4

22/08/07 23:21

(Archived)

Chuck for the win !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

bL4z3

#-5

14/08/07 19:30

(Archived)

3 gründe warum chuck norris einfach der über-master ist :

missing in action 1

missing in action 2

missing in action 3

!

trak

#-6

28/07/07 16:24

(Archived)

chuck wjezdza i rozpierdala---->Oto jego motto :)

off1ine

#-7

25/07/07 18:27

(Archived)

Chuck Norris kann eine Drehtür zu schlagen.

GoMeZ

#-8

24/07/07 21:20

(Archived)

non esistono disabili,ci sono solo persone che hanno incontrato chuk norris...

Nvestibulocochlearis

#-9

10/07/07 13:05

(Archived)

Chuck Norris bekommt 20% bei Praktiker, sogar auf Tiernahrung

offl1ne

#-10

11/06/07 23:07

(Archived)

Chuck Norris erfand eine Sprache aus Tritten und Schlägen. Also wenn er dich schlägt oder tritt nicht gleich weglaufen, er will nur mit dir reden.

Nvestibulocochlearis

#-11

08/06/07 01:33

(Archived)

Chuck Norris kann eine Partie Vier Gewinnt in drei Zügen gewinnen.

VECIENZOF

#-12

28/05/07 20:32

(Archived)

è ricominciato su italia 1 :D

TheG@me

#-13

27/05/07 12:39

(Archived)

Chuck Norris Is My Brother!!!!

NoReflex

#-14

25/05/07 17:47

(Archived)

chuck loves himself

f a m a .

#-15

18/05/07 15:58

(Archived)

i <3 chuck,but chuk doesn't love me :'(

Tha Playah

#-16

11/05/07 19:18

(Archived)

ich will auch rein :(

reapr

#-17

06/05/07 16:16

(Archived)

Join the Wacken ´07 Team:
http://www.esl-europe.net/join_team/2461950/?joinpw=wacken

kazw3i

#-18

28/04/07 13:07

(Archived)

gL hF CHUCK NORRIS 4TW

HIER KLICKEN

reapr

#-19

06/04/07 11:50

(Archived)

http://www.bamcro.de.tk/

Enj0y

#-20

20/03/07 17:44

(Archived)

Please invide me to Clan! E-mail: vaelpy@aol.com

iNsider-

#-21

20/02/07 14:02

(Archived)

si ma fun non si scrive con la A

Jimmy

#-22

26/01/07 13:12

(Archived)

CHUCK NORRIS HAT VOLL FETT STIERNACKEN!11

Commandos

#-23

25/01/07 21:56

(Archived)

vojo esse clan leader

Geme

#-24

06/01/07 11:23

(Archived)

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^| ||
|...IL CAMION TAILANDESE ..........| ||'|";, ___.
|_..._..._______===|=||_|__|..., ] -
"(@)'(@)"""''"**|(@)(@)*****''(@)
x il mio penfriend

moderN

#-25

26/12/06 09:35

(Archived)

Chuck r0x :D

Shika

#-26

19/12/06 15:43

(Archived)

virgo skilled :D
http://www.esl.eu/it/join_team/2196626/?joinpw=virgo

Midori SupErsTar

#-27

18/12/06 20:57

(Archived)

http://www.verficktescheisse.c...huck-norris-facts/#more-188
have fun mit dem stoff :D !

Templar

#-28

29/11/06 23:56

(Archived)

I have heard over 500 facts of chuck norris ... but the best one is in italian:
"Chuck Norris fuma toscani. Vivi!"
Here are other good facts:

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

Chuck Norris proved that we are alone in the universe. We weren''t before his first space expedition.

Chuck Norris is the only person in the world that can actually email a roundhouse kick.

Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

"Brokeback Mountain" is not just a movie. It''s also what Chuck Norris calls the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard.

.... and so on ... Chuck Norris pwns!

Braddock

#-29

22/11/06 22:47

(Archived)

Ich sag nur eins. Missing in Action :D

LoVe

#-30

18/11/06 16:31

(Archived)

chuck norris geht nicht jagen er geht töten denn beim jagen ist die wahrscheinlichkeit zu hoch des versagens!

X S T Y L E

#-31

14/11/06 16:55

(Archived)

- http://www.esl.eu/join_team/2136901/?joinpw=x

KaplaN

#-32

20/10/06 14:44

(Archived)

lool alle italiano style in chukies fan oder wass ??? :P

MrRubberhead

#-33

22/09/06 11:05

(Archived)

# t is said that every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten. Every time God masturbates, Chuck Norris kills a lion.

# The word 'Kill' was invented by Chuck Norris. Other words were 'Die', 'Beer', and 'What'.

# Chuck Norris is a vegetarian. Meaning, he does not eat animals until first he puts them into vegetative state with his fists.

# The 11th commandment is “Thou shalt not piss off Chuck Norris” This commandment is rarely enforced, as it is impossible to accomplish.

# Chuck Norris is his own line at the DMV.

# Two wrongs don't make a right. Unless you're Chuck Norris. Then two wrongs make a roundhouse kick to the face.

# Who let the dogs out? Chuck Norris let the dogs out... and then roundhouse kicked them through an Oldsmobile.

# Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick faster than the speed of light. This means that if you turn on a light switch, you will be dead before the lightbulb turns on.

# When Chuck Norris goes to out to eat, he orders a whole chicken, but he only eats its soul.

# Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

# Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.

# If Chuck Norris wants your opinion, he'll beat it into you.

# Not everyone that Chuck Norris is mad at gets killed. Some get away. They are called astronauts.

# Chuck Norris has to register every part of his body as a separate lethal weapon. His spleen is considered a concealed weapon in over 50 states.

# A movie scene depicting Chuck Norris losing a fight with Bruce Lee was the product of history's most expensive visual effect. When adjusted for inflation, the effect cost more than the Gross National Product of Paraguay.

# Godzilla is a Japanese rendition of Chuck Norris' first visit to Tokyo.

# They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take shit from anybody.

# Chuck Norris once rode a nine foot grizzly bear through an automatic car wash, instead of taking a shower.

# "Sweating bullets" is literally what happens when Chuck Norris gets too hot.

# Chuck Norris' sperm can be seen with the naked eye. Each one is the size of a quarter.

# After taking a steroids test doctors informed Chuck Norris that he had tested positive. He laughed upon receiving this information, and said "of course my urine tested positive, what do you think they make steroids from?"

# Chuck Norris doesn't daydream. He's too busy giving other people nightmares.

# When Arnold says the line "I'll be back" in the first Terminator movie it is implied that is he going to ask Chuck Norris for help.

# There are no such things as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.

# Chuck Norris' Penis is a third degree blackbelt, and an honorable 32nd-degree mason.

# Chuck Norris does not follow fashion trends, they follow him. But then he turns around and kicks their ass. Nobody follows Chuck Norris.

# The phrase 'break a leg' was originally coined by Chuck Norris's co-stars in Walker, Texas Ranger as a good luck charm indicating that a broken leg might be the worst extent of their injuries. This never proved to be the case.

# Chuck Norris’ roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye.

# Diamonds are not, despite popular belief, carbon. They are, in fact, Chuck Norris fecal matter. This was proven a recently, when scientific analysis revealed what appeared to be Jean-Claude Van Damme bone fragments inside the Hope Diamond.

# Chuck Norris once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.

# The Drummer for Def Leppard's only got one arm. Chuck Norris needed a back scratcher.

# Chuck Norris was the orginal sculptor of Mount Rushmore. He completed the entire project using only a bottle opener and a drywall trowel.

# Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf.

# Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.

# For Spring Break '05, Chuck Norris drove to Madagascar, riding a chariot pulled by two electric eels.

# The Manhattan Project was not intended to create nuclear weapons, it was meant to recreate the destructive power in a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick. They didn't even come close.

# Chuck Norris has banned rainbows from the state of North Dakota.

# Divide Chuck Norris by zero and you will in fact get one........one bad-ass that is.

# TNT was originally developed by Chuck Norris to cure indigestion.

# After returning from World War 2 unscathed, Bob Dole was congratulated by Chuck Norris with a handshake. The rest is history.

# Chuck Norris runs on batteries. Specifically, Die Hards.

# "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor" was originally written as Chuck Norris' theme song.

# Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

# Only Chuck Norris can prevent forest fires.

# When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.

# Chuck Norris is not Irish. His hair is soaked in the blood of his victims.

# In the movie "The Matrix", Chuck Norris is the Matrix. If you pay close attention in the green "falling code" scenes, you can make out the faint texture of his beard.

# Chuck Norris' dick is so big, it has it's own dick, and that dick is still bigger than yours.

# They say curiosity killed the cat. This is false. Chuck Norris killed the cat. Every single one of them.

# There is no such thing as a lesbian, just a woman who has never met Chuck Norris.

# Chuck Norris crossed the road. No one has ever dared question his motives.

# When Chuck Norris was born, he immediately had sex with the first nurse he saw. He was her first. She was his third. That afternoon.

# One time, at band camp, Chuck Norris ate a percussionist.

# Chuck Norris doesn't say "who's your daddy", because he knows the answer.

# Chuck Norris originally wrote the first dictionary. The definition for each word is as follows - A swift roundhouse kick to the face.

# Love does not hurt. Chuck Norris does.

# The term "Cleveland Steamer" got its name from Chuck Norris, when he took a dump while visiting the Rock and Roll Hall of fame and buried northern Ohio under a glacier of fecal matter.

# Chuck Norris once round-house kicked a salesman. Over the phone.

# The pen is mighter than the sword, but only if the pen is held by Chuck Norris.

MrRubberhead

#-34

22/09/06 11:00

(Archived)

No Place for me left^^ FOund a subteam!

Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.

There is no chin under Chuck Norris' Beard. There is only another fist.

Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.

Chuck Norris is my Homeboy.

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING

Puddingpulver

#-35

14/09/06 13:04

(Archived)

Hier sind erstma meine Favoriten, da sin welche dabei, da hab ich vorlachen mich nimma gekriegt, ein kumpel hat sich sogar aufn tisch gelegt un angefangen zu weinen, ok warn paar(#relativ) alkoholische Getränke im Spiel, aber e war echt der Hamma...

Also hier für euch ::

Chuck Norris hat einmal Russisches Roulette mit einem komplett geladenen Colt gespielt…und gewonnen!

Wenn Chuck Norris Push-Ups macht, drückt er sich nicht selbst hoch, sondern die Erde runter.

Chuck Norris KANN eine Schwingtür zuschlagen.

Chuck Norris HAT Rom an einem Tag erbaut.

Chuck Norris kann Feuer mit einer Lupe machen…Nachts!

Chuck Norris liest keine Bücher: Er starrt sie so lange an, bis sie ihm freiwillig sagen was er wissen will.

Chuck Norris schläft mit Licht an. Nicht weil Chuck Angst vor der Dunkelheit hätte, sondern die Dunkelheit vor ihm.

Chuck Norris ist vor 10 Jahren gestorben. Der TOD hatte bis jetzt nur noch nicht den Mut es ihm zu sagen.

Chuck Norris wurde eigentlich als Drilling geboren. Seine Brüder waren TOD und SCHMERZEN!

Es gibt keine Massenvernichtungswaffen, nur Chuck Norris.

Wenn Chuck Norris ins Wasser fällt, wird er nicht nass…aber das Wasser wird Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris’ Haus hat keine Türen, nur Mauern durch die er läuft.

Gut --> Besser --> Am Besten --> Perfekt --> Chuck Norris !

Schaut vorbei

PLS Eintrag machen

faaace

#-36

06/09/06 17:57

(Archived)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D6r9eOLoc_s

Caball

#-37

28/08/06 15:11

(Archived)

roundhousekick ? huhu :)

WUTZ

#-38

01/08/06 09:44

(Archived)

omg should we found a second team lol

SaviouR

#-39

28/07/06 11:11

(Archived)

Is there a second Team of this type, because this team is obviously full ... ^^

fraGile

#-40

27/07/06 16:17

(Archived)

http://youtube.com/watch?v=5015uTpcg_s
http://youtube.com/watch?v=X4qMv653dus
Chuck norris in oblivion episodi 1 & 2

t0bS

#-41

22/07/06 00:22

(Archived)

#38 chuck norris 4 lifE

Pol46 is. P0l4hHhHh

#-42

21/07/06 08:59

(Archived)

chuck norris può aprire le acque a suon di pugni

Sc0rp

#-43

14/07/06 00:58

(Archived)

chuck norris - the one and only pG :P

rejbn

#-44

11/07/06 15:15

(Archived)

Trezeguet, al momento di tirare il rigore, si è ricordato che Chuck Norris aveva comprato un televisore da MediaWorld

Hell88

#-45

29/06/06 22:30

(Archived)

---- chuck norris può dividere per 0 ----:-)

warrior

#-46

26/06/06 09:24

(Archived)

Chuck norris use cocaine 4 sleep...

Lance

#-47

23/06/06 14:32

(Archived)

Chuck Norris taglia i grissini col tonno!

s1xp4c

#-48

22/06/06 22:01

(Archived)

BäM

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